What does it mean to “let go”?
I have been sitting in this question the last few days as I let go of soul contracts that no longer work for me. Even though I don’t know exactly what this looks like, I trusted my guides to work with me, and through me, on this matter.
In the process of writing the blog posting about soul contracts and predestination, I received an amazing release of energy at the back of head, as though I was given an invisible cranial. In that moment, I felt my inner wiring shift, and a new path open up. It was extraordinary.
Is this what they call clearing the brain chemistry? Is there such a thing? I was on a high for a day or so and then fell back to earth with a thud. I was suddenly reminded that I am in a space of letting go and I felt sad. I’m not good at letting go. I like hanging on. I like analyzing and keeping hold of the old, just in case I might need it again. So letting go does not come easily to me, it does not feel natural.
I admire those people who are truly resilient at letting go. You’ve probably met the type. They can just live in the moment, here today, gone tomorrow. But in that moment of connection: they live life to the full. They are like super-charged, high-octane Duracell-bunnies who don’t know the meaning of the word: cling.
The Free Online Dictionary describes cling as a verb:intr.v. clung (klng), cling·ing, clings
1. To hold fast or adhere to something, as by grasping, sticking, embracing, or entwining: clung to the rope to keep from falling; fabrics that cling to the body.
2. To remain close; resist separation: We clung together in the storm.
3. To remain emotionally attached; hold on: clinging to outdated customs. n. Botany
Courtesy of: http://www.thefreedictionary.com/cling
These other people, co-existing in my Universe, just let go and move on. Admirable, really. What a concept. Why can’t I be more like them?
So now, I am letting go of the old me, the old paradigm, the old way of being in the world. I am walking out in trust into the new, even though I don’t know what that looks like.
And yes, I asked for a Reality Shift and we never know what the new will look like, but for me, the letting go is both practical and emotional. This letting go opens the door into the new.
Letting go or selling my little apartment is part of this shift. Yesterday, I spoke to a real estate agent, who said that they were giving me a reality shift about the real estate market. I loved their choice of words: I couldn’t believe they actually said: reality shift, but truly they did, because that, of course, allowed me to tell them about my blog. (Which they liked, naturally.)
A friend of mine said to me today: “Well, you have stayed in your current building too long. You have outgrown it. It’s just not a fit anymore”.
And she’s right. I understand this is part of letting go. And maybe last year or the year before, I should have left: the signs were there, but emotionally, I was too attached. I was clinging.
Picture this: a piece of gum stuck to a chair, which has become crystallized. NOTHING WOULD REMOVE THAT GUM.
That was me last year. Neither hell nor high water – don’t you love that saying – was getting me to shift.
Didn’t matter that I was unhappy, this was my little nest and I didn’t, couldn’t, wouldn’t leave my nest. And no one is going to make me leave my nest, so there! (Get the picture?) I am ever so slowly beginning to grasp the cosmic humour.)
Now that I understand soul fragmentation, which I described near the beginning of my blog posting, I can let myself off the hook of self-recrimination. Life has served me well. Being stuck has served me well; and being unwilling to budge has helped me shift to this place of letting go.Yes, I am ready to let go. Before I wasn’t. Hallelujah.
In one of my many therapy courses, I was told there are only 3 truly authentic feelings: glad, mad, and sad. Everything else is a neurosis of some sort.
Whether or not you accept that as true depends on whether that is true for you.
I have cycled through these feelings of glad, knowing that I am moving into the new; (yeah); feeling mad, what took so long and why did it have to be this way, and good grief, it seems to take SUCH A LONG TIME TO SHIFT OLD PATTERNS; and sad, the letting go. It’s my familiar old muck so why can’t I keep it. You know what I mean.
So now, all I can say to myself is: Way to go girl, you’re on track.
Or as Higgins said in the 1964 movie: My Fair Lady: “I think she’s got it. I think she’s got it!”